Epiphanies!
by MonkeyRead
Summary: With the sun setting the sky pink in Egypt, some people have a lot on their mind.
1. Chapter 1

Waiting for the ship they were hitching a riding home in, Sam thought he'd never been more confused. Looking around at all the people that had followed him to Egypt on his advice he could barely believe it. How had all this come about? It was almost too good to be true that all the elements needed had come together to form the contingent that had wiped out the decepticons. The irony of serendipity being too much of a coincidence was almost funny, and darn near too convoluted to understand.

His head was spinning cause this battle had happened so fast and was over almost before it began. He was so TIRED! Not just physically or mentally. He could happily lay down and die again and be perfectly content to stay there until his body rotted away. He almost let out a half-hysterical giggle at that image.

He felt weird with some of the others now, the humans especially. They didn't understand what had happened and he couldn't explain it to them in enough detail or in just the right way that they would understand. It was like trying to explain color to the blind, or taste to a mech. As the old saying goes, "Seeing is believing". All anyone else saw was someone being revived... Everyone's seen it on TV; E.R., House, even soaps have names after hospitals. As for me bringing back Optimus, it goes back to the beginning. He's a machine. He was rebooted. I fixed his glitch. You name it, that's the answer. There was a lot of people that thought their explanation was the correct one. The human condition is almost savage in it's intent to stay alone in the universe. As long and the humans could look at the Cybertronians and see "Giant Japanese Computers" they were fine. Then I come along, muddying the waters with Holy Relics and visiting THE first Primes...

And the weird thing is that that's probably not what would freak people out. Not then and not now. No, what would really make them want to lock me away for a real long time and get me counseling is that I believe. I believe in the Matrix. I believe in the first Primes. I believe my Bee is my best friend in the entire world and I owe him a wash and wax. I absolutely, positively, superkalafragalistically believe in Optimus. I BELIEVE! It's a little unnerving to look at him now and know he was dead. Oh, I know in my head he's just a wise ole mech, but my heart sings with the knowledge that he would be there in a second if I needed him, helping me with whatever I needed. It's almost freaky to me just how much faith I have in him. But!, that faith has also been proven true. Optimus Prime has never let me down. He has never failed to do what he set out to do. He DIED for me... And so, I died for him also. I'm not sure how to feel about that. I know I don't want his gratitude. I didn't do it for reward or any type of gain. Simply put, I wanted my friend back. The friend that put himself aside and fought for his species. That was selfless for millennia as he fought the good fight. Having sparkbreak after sparkbreak when fellow soldiers or civilians offlined in their war. Personally, I'm not sure if the war ever ended if Optimus would be alright. He has fought so long and so hard that it's probably hardwired into his frame by now. Us humans think of being in the same job for five to ten years as a long time. Retirement after thirty-five years is an accomplishment... Primus help them to keep going, to keep LIVING.

Sam didn't feel ridiculous at all thinking these things. With what had happened to him over the years the time had seemed to stretch out longer with the fighting. If it felt like a never ending cycle to him then it must be an atrocious nightmare for the 'Bots. Fighting not just the 'Cons, but the humans as well. The government had been giving the 'Bots fits for years and he'd never once thought maybe he could make their fight just a little easier, a little less like combat. Looking back, he couldn't believe how selfish he'd been. Here he was lolly-gagging around, brushing off Bee, so he could go to College. While at the same time leaving his friends, compatriots, and companions out to dry to be eaten by the hyena. The worse thing though is thinking that they're okay with that. They understand and want the humans to be able to stay naive of the dangers of the universe. But, there also comes a time when you have to grow up and the rose colored glasses are lifted from you eyes. Today is that day for Samuel James Witwicky. Just like Optimus had said, "Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing." When that day comes you can either take up the reigns of your life and lead it or you can scream your head off and stuff your head in the sand. Personally, running and sticking your head in the sand in his experience just gets you shot in the rear, but that's unfortunately how most humans would handle situations like this.

Seeing Optimus standing in the distance packing away his new/old parts, watching the clean-up and repair going on around him Sam got a bizarre, almost out of time feeling in his gut. He had one of those moments that only come along once or twice in a lifetime. His situation, friends, family, and himself came to him in sharp relief, like he was seeing everything for the first time. He knew he could go back to the way he was before, blissfully ignorant of the things expected of him and go back to college. He didn't know what the consequences of doing such a thing would be but he'd already decided not to go back to that. His friends look on him as a source of strength and courage. He could see how that had come about but felt very uncomfortable with it. He didn't think of himself as overly strong or brave. His family, his dad especially looked at him proudly but with a wistfulness at those earlier times when they were just Sam, Ron, and Judy. Sam was most uncomfortable with knowing himself. He had grown so much since the Autobots had come that he was almost unrecognizable from his former self. Now, he couldn't see himself kicking his best friend out of the car for a girl. He couldn't see himself being envious of a muscle bound idiot of a football player. He couldn't believe that his former self had tried to sell important familial artifacts on EBAY of all places, and he definitely didn't see himself as "LadiesMan217". Running away when Optimus had pleaded for help was an action his former self had taken, and he was glad that that's not who he was anymore. Taking a deep breath of what felt like the first fresh air in years he look upon himself with a sense of pride and accomplishment. Oh, he knew not to take it too far, else 'Hide would fire up his cannons but knowing himself now and knowing what he was willing to do in future gave him strength of self. His skin fit. His heart settled. His eyes took on new knowledge and wisdom. He knew, that he knew, that he knew. His knowing was absolute... There was no going back.


	2. Chapter 2

Watching the humans scurrying about, trying to patch up what our enemies had destroyed, Optimus gave a soft sigh. He had always known coming here would bring his enemies and had tried to think of any other option but knew it was the only way to keep the humans somewhat safe. It would be a fairy tale for Autobots and Decepticons to have a designated war zone. The humans would probably turn it into one of their "video games". Wouldn't that go over well? He could see their government now, calling a meeting about how we've "impacted" their lives dangerously because we are teaching their children it is alright to be aggressive. Not mentioning the fact that we 'Bots know nothing of "video games" and would not want to make one anyway. No, we have enough trouble just trying to handle our enemies and cover our own afts. That is mostly why 'Cons gain ground on the 'Bots. 'Cons have nothing to protect. Nothing they value. Nothing to hold or cherish. All they do is attack and retreat, never defend.

They had had no choice about bringing their war here but Optimus was still regretful. The alternative of leaving Earth, and the humans, to the Decepticons was unacceptable. He hoped, at least some humans, saw his people not just as war machines, or as giant robots, but soldiers fighting for what we believe in. We run on hope and faith. We hope, that at the end of the day, progress has been made either within ourselves or our enemies. A soft word of encouragement at the right time or a servo of commiseration on the shoulder can go a long way toward healing. Wheelie and Jetfire prove that there is hope for our enemies. We just have to find the right way to approach them. We strive to keep faith that someday peace will be found at last. That one day, two soldiers of different sides, would see not an enemy in the other, but a brother or sister. As family, instead of adversaries. As two Cybertronians, instead of an Autobot and a Decepticon. He fought not to hate his brother. Humans had a saying of a, "Love, hate relationship". It was a spectacularly good description of his and Megatrons relationship. He fought everyday to _**not**_ accept the evil that had seduced his brothers spark. Megatron had decided to do evil and he could just as well decide to do good. If he accepted that the evil in his people was absolute, then he accepted that there was no hope for his enemies. No hope for his people. No hope for his brother. Oh, he knew it was foolish after so long, to hope that Megatron was not totally lost to the darkness that has consumed his spark but he could not help the little voice in the back of his processor saying that there was yet good in him. That was his fear, that there _**was**_ nothing good left in Megatron. He felt his spark sink lower with the thought. You would think millenia was long enough to mourn for his brother but it hurt just as much today as it did then. Primus, help him, help them all.

He sighed again and took a look around, trying to find something to bring him out of his disillusionment. The mechs around him were working well with other humans trying to fix the pyramid. Laughter floated his way as one of the 'Bots made a horrible sound in his gears from all the sand. Sure enough, Ratchet heard and looked over frowning at the embarrassed mech. Making his way over to Sideswipe, Ratchet passed Optimus saying, "I'm going to take some of this sand home so I can make some kind of solvent to take care of our moving parts. This is ridiculous, slag it! He is the third one today. By the time we get back to base, everyone is going to need maintenance. Hmpf!" With a half smile Optimus closed up the container holding Jetfire's donated parts.

His mind went back to what Sam had told him of the Primes visit...

_Sam... we have been watching you for a long, long time. You have fought for Optimus, our last descendant, with courage and sacrifice, the qualities of a leader. A leader worthy of our secret. The Matrix of Leadership cannot be found, it must be earned. Return now to Optimus. Merge the Matrix with his spark. It was, and has always been, your destiny... _

Optimus wasn't sure what consequences Sam's action could have in the future but he knew they would come to light sooner or later. From what he had seen of the Primes they acted first and explained second, _maybe_, if they felt like it. Looking into the colorful sunset he knew he'd have to face what had taken place while he was dead. From the little everyone had told him Sam had orchestrated the whole rescue/resurrection operation. They were definitely going to have a long talk pretty soon.

Optimus knew that no one was aware of what had happened to him while he was dead. He body might have been vacant at the time but his spark was still active somewhere else. He didn't know why he'd kept what the Prime's had said to himself a secret only that he got the nagging feeling that there was an appointed time for that conversation to take place and now was not the time. Optimus was still reeling from what was said himself, he was sure the others couldn't handle it. He would know when it was time. He thought back to his own experiences with the Dynasty of Primes...

_He remembered bright lights and rocks under him. Looking around Optimus saw a desert landscape and the shadowy figures of six huge mechs. Checking his systems he found that his __chronometer__ had stopped gaining time. _

_"So, I have failed to protect Samuel..." he said sadly and hung his head. He cringed thinking of Samuel in Megatrons servos. He remembered Megatron saying Samuel could lead them to another energon source. How would Sam know anything about energon? And what had Megatron been doing with Samuel when they attacked that warehouse? Obviously, he had missed some important information._

_"You have done what you ought. It is Sams' time to find his way now. You could not help him find his path. Alone, you must prove yourself. Alone, you must face your greatest foe. And so shall Samuel." It seemed like the voice came from nowhere and everywhere at once. Looking up at the Dynasty of Primes, his mind reeled. Thoughts of Samuel raced through his processor, laughing, running, playing with Bee. He didn't understand. Of course, this was a... What had Glen called it? A "near death experience". He almost snorted, that boy was a handful, especially with an overload of sugar in his system._

_"What would you have me do?" he asked the Primes._

_All the Primes looked at each other and a great hum started. It was so deep and rumbling he could feel it in his spark. Optimus' vision darkened, then snapped into focus sharply. Looking around he saw himself back at Mission City. Watching the past he could see it all very clearly. It was like he was watching with someone else's optics and objectivity. He could tell that the past Optimus didn't want to kill Megatron. Even then he felt retched about his brother being his enemy. It was a relief that Sam had taken what he had said about his spark and the cube and applied it to Megatron instead. He could clearly see his past battles with Megatron. Over and over he had taken the battle to the edge enough that Megatron retreated. He could never bring himself to make that final strike. Couldn't stand to be without family. "I'm weak," Optimus thought. He couldn't ever kill his brother. It just wasn't in him. Maybe this is what he'd have to do to prove himself to the Primes... He thought of some of the last things he had heard in his life, "There is another source of Energon hidden on this planet! The boy can lead us to it! Is the future of our race not worth a single human life?" Optimus had replied that Megatron would never stop at just one. His spark cleared swiftly and he was certain even if it wasn't what the Primes wanted that he would never stop trying to save his brother. If Megatron wanted to save the Cybertronian race with Samuels' life then Optimus could not save them by killing Megatron either. With Megatron dead, only another Decepticon would take his place, and it would start all over again. Just like Megatron would not take only one human life, the Autobots would not be able just to take Megatrons life. The viciousness of this cycle he could see lasting until there were no Cybertronians left. He thought of all the people that had lost their life in this war, the __sacrifices_**all**_ of us have made to be here today... He did not want the ends to justify the means. There are some things that are suppose to be sacred. He mourned the loss of life. _

_He found himself back in front of the Dynasty of Primes. They all watched him silently. Optimus was getting frustrated about the whole "prove himself" thing and said, "What can any of us do to end this senseless slaughter? I'll ask again... What would you have me to do? The killing will not stop unless drastic measures are taken and I'm not willing to lose more comrades or the only family I have left. A devastated and broken race is not _**alive**_."_

_The silence was deafening. Optimus looked at the six Primes for direction and guidance and with dwindling patience. All the Primes put their servos over their sparks and, "hmmed", __resonantly.__ As one they looked down at Optimus and spoke four words, "Listen to your heart."_


End file.
